Monday, June 11, 2012

Sweet Sweet Summertime

Hey Y'all! I'm baaaa-aack!  Can you believe it's summer time again??!! Every summer I always get this irresistible urge to become a teacher.  All I want to do is help those children.  I just want to teach those precious little darlings reading and writing and arithmetic.  And then teach them what arithmetic means.  Oh how I want to be a teacher... but then mid August comes and I'm really over it.  But hey, you don't have to be a teacher to enjoy the summer.  Almost everyone I know enjoys the summer some way or another (some a little more than they should - if you know what I mean).  To celebrate the beginning of the summer I've decided to let y'all in on some of my favorite things about summer.  So here's what made the Top Ten:

1. Grocery store feet.  People will fall into one of two catergories on this subject: People who have children and the people that do not have children.  Those of us that have children don't really worry about it. We don't sweat it.  We know that under all that nasty-footedness there is a real child foot under there.   We do this because most of us haven't seen clean footed children since the middle of May.  We don't mind it.  We feel like they are building up an immunity to all things- baldness, canker sores, insomnia, etc.  It works for us.  Now those of you that don't have children - you will notice the grocery store feet and snarl your nose up them. It's ok- it will be just one of the many things that you will be wrong about. 

2. Crickets and cicada's singing at night.  It's one of the most beautiful sounds at night. It's basically like the theme song of the summer.  And the hotter it gets the louder those little creatures sing.  I love them.....unless one of them lands on me and I will go all ninja on it and deliver a death so swift and powerful that all the other crawly buggy insects will think twice before they come near me again. I won't think twice about squashing their tiny little bug guts all over my patio or trying to cause them to become deaf by unleashing a bloodcurdling scream.   Other than that I love to hear their sweet song of the South.

3. Water.  I love love love the water.  Any form of it.  Pools, lakes, oceans, rivers, sprinklers. ( But not water theme parks: That is not water.  That is chlorine with a little water mixed in but it's mostly bodily fluids I need not think of- that is whole other blog I will touch on later).  You need to get out there and splash. I can guarantee if you find a cool swimming hole, your day will get much better. 

4. Long days. The mornings start earlier and the evenings end later.  The day is stretched out into infinity it seems.  The sun lingers.  These are the times that we can get so much accomplished. You could exercise, work out in the yard more, clean more.  Or in my case it gives me extra time to sit on my porch to list all those things I could be doing.  While drinking a cup of coffee.  So there. 

5. Summer Veggies.  Now if you live in anywhere within the sound of my keyboard, then you either grow a garden or know someone who grows a garden.  The "haves" are almost always eager to share with the "have nots."  Unless they caught your cat "fertilizing" their garden.  The law states they don't have to share with you then.   There are oodles of farmers markets, roadside stands or just plain ole friendly neighbors where you can pick up some of these limited time only vegetables.  Cursed are those that buy tomatoes from the grocery store in the summer time! Shame on you!!! May your socks fall down into your shoes forever!

6. Porch Swings. Don't try to analyze why a porch swing is so good, just sit down and revel in it's greatness. 

7. Home town ball parks.  Oh my.  The memories I have from the ball park are endless.  The neatly lined fields by some  sucker wonderful parent, the wafting smell of nachos and hot dogs, and the cheers when someone becomes a legend in their parents' eyes are just some of the things that come to mind when I think of my own ball park.  Ball parks are where we learn the basics and fundamentals as children and as adults we learn what the game is really all about. 

8. Lemonade Stands. If you have never stopped by an old fashioned lemonade stand and gotten a small cup of  Heaven, you have not lived my friend!! You are not only contributing to the success of a future entrepreneur, but also warming your own heart.  There's no other place in the world that you will drink a hot, sour and often times dirty glass of lemonade and ask for a second cup.  If you're lucky the dirt will only be on the outside of glass.  Well, I guess a little dirt never hurt anyone. 

9. The Wal-Mart fashion show. My summer is not complete until I have seen the "Braless Wonder".  She's like the Great Pumpkin in the Charlie Brown cartoon. She is an elusive mythical creature that comes out during the summertime. She sports a tank top, tube top, or any top... but no brassiere.  She is mainly seen at the Wal-Marts, but I have heard that she will make an appearance at your home town ball park occasionally.   You must wait for her.  You may even have to hide.  But when you see her, you'll know.  You'll just know. ... . 

10. Serenity. I have a simple formula for this.  No getting kids up for school + no homework the night before / vacations x 2 holidays that don't require buying presents for = peace. 

We only have a few weeks of summer we can soak up.  Find some water or a porch swing or even just a tiny little girl with a lemonade stand and enjoy it while it lasts.  You can thank me later. 

Til Tomorrow!