Tuesday, August 12, 2014

Ode to a Trapper Keeper

All of this back to school business always makes me sentimental so I was telling Little Emmer about the coolest, most awesome, greatest invention school supplies ever birthed. No not the pen that had all those colors you could click and change ink ( but that was pretty awesome ) - I'm talking about the Trapper Keeper. I told her all about the various designs and pictures you could choose from. Then if you were a serious student how you got the one with the double closure. And the absolute best part was the sound. I mean come on - if you don't just get chill bumps thinking about that awesome Velcro sound - you my friend are not my friend. ( or you didn't have the pleasure of going to school in the late 1980's).  Little Emmer still didn't get it so I had to compare it to the pitiful "binders" they have now. Then she got interested. So of course we google it. Couple of keystrokes - I was right back in 1988 -4th grade. Mötley Crüe was singing about stuff I didn't understand but I still liked the sound. Cheerleaders were my idol. And my Trapper Keeper was keeping organized and looking good. The world was good place. I can smell gym now. Ahhhh!! Still smells like feet. 
So of course her next question was - "Mom do they still make them?" Well let's just see. What did we do before Google? We lied. Or guessed. Or lived in world shrouded in sweet mysteries. But not today - today I am going to finally know if my old buddy, my old pal, Trapper Keeper (preferably a Lisa Franks design) is still made. And in less than 2.345688 seconds - I knew. It is!!! It's a miracle!!! I did a little inappropriate dance. But hey it's not everyday you can share something from your childhood with your own flesh and blood!! Here we come TK. We will just visit this website and what the what!? What is thing calling itself a Trapper Keeper? It has the words "Trapper Keeper" on it but that's the only thing I see familiar. Where is the shiny smooth plastic that protected my horse running through a green pasture, or my rainbow raining hearts down into fluffy clouds or those huge lips?? Where is the VELCRO for goodness sake? This is a mockery. This is a rip off ! This is a tragedy. 
We watched in the mirror as we grew up. We sadly watch as our children grow up. But never did think in a million years that my beloved Trapper Keeper would grow up. And unfortunately he grew up to be a responsible,boring, 58 year old man. He traded in his see through  plastic for some practical stain resistant nylon. He traded his fancy prints out for a more streamlined (*boring) one color that matches black. And sadly, he even gave up his Velcro for a zipper. Maybe a snap. I don't know I was too hurt to look. 

So my point is - some things  in the past were actually better in the past.  Youth is fleeting. We all grow up. And sometimes it sucks. 

Til tomorrow !